Today, I want to talk about developmental milestones, a term not heard much anymore. Developmental milestones are those markers in a child's development that let you know your child is developing normally and at the correct rate. If you don't know to watch for these markers, you won't know if your child is having a problem. For example, if your child is six month's old, he or she should be able to do the following:
Motor Skills
- hold head steady when sitting with your help
- reach for and grasp objects
- play with his toes
- help hold the bottle during feeding
- explore by mouthing and banging objects
- move toys from one hand to another
- shake a rattle
- pull up to a sitting position on her own if you grasp her hands
- sit with only a little support
- sit in a high chair
- roll over
- bounce when held in a standing position
Sensory and Thinking Skills
- open his mouth for the spoon
- imitate familiar actions you perform
Language and Social Skills
- babble, making almost sing-song sounds
- know familiar faces
- laugh and squeal with delight
- scream if annoyed
- smile at herself in a mirror
Now there will be differences in the rate at which each child develops. Do not expect your child to be able to do all of these on the exact day that he or she is six months old. However, be aware of your child's progress so that you spot a problem early on. With regard to children and their development, the earlier you spot a delay, the earlier you will be able to intervene and get help from a professional.
Check out the following website for other developmental markers as your child advances in age: http://www.med.umich.edu/yourchild/topics/devmile.htm And if your child is not developing at a normal rate, talk to your pediatrician. Early intervention is the key and can make the difference between success or failure in your child's school career.
I have been watching Jamie Oliver's show on the Food Network in which he is working with a school district in West Virginia to provide healthier school lunches. In the course of his educating the children on better food choices, he spent time in a kindergarten class. He brought in foods such as celery, eggplant, tomatoes, and potatoes to see if the children could identify each one. You guessed it. They could not. Why is that? One reason is that no one had talked to these children about these foods. Perhaps there was not money in the family budget for fresh vegetables. Or maybe processed foods have taken over our society to the point where families don't cook fresh vegetables anymore. Or maybe these kiddos just needed a little instruction.
Once Jamie had attempted this lesson with the class, the teacher decided to teach the children about vegetables. Within two weeks, when Jamie went back to the same class, all of the children could identify all of the vegetables. It was a beautiful thing to see.
To help your child identify fruits and/or vegetables and to develop vocabulary, do the following: when you are in the grocery store, have your child name each item you are adding to the cart. To help with letter and sound recognition, a pre-cursor to reading, sound out the first sound in the word and name that letter sound. Or you can say, "Let's find a vegetable that begins with B". Pick up broccoli." Yes, broccoli. Broccoli begins with B."
Even your older children will benefit from this exercise. You can greatly expand their vocabulary by choosing vegetables or fruits like artichokes, cauliflower, pomegranate, or mango to talk about. All children love to learn new words, especially if they are big words that are fun to say. Who knows, your child may even ask to sample some of the food you talk about.
I have spent considerable time over the years watching parents and children. In particular, I watch to see how carefully children are supervised when out in public. I do this because I am a self-confessed fanatic where the safety of children is concerned. That being said, I developed a mental exercise several years ago to help me determine whether a child is being supervised properly.
I imagine myself with a pocket full of round stickers that say, "This child could have been kidnapped today". These stickers would be about the size of a silver dollar. If the child were close enough to me and far enough from their parent so that I could have placed a sticker on that child or handed the sticker to the child , then those parents were too far away from that child and there was too great an opportunity for tragedy. I have never really done this because of the liability involved. However, it is an interesting thing to contemplate.
I am discussing this subject today because I spent last Friday on Disney property and had many opportunities to think about my "sticker project". A particular situation occurred at the Disney Ice Cream Parlor in EPCOT. My daughter and I wanted a sundae but there was a very long line inside and very few tables available outside. She stood in the line and I went out to save a table. As I sat outside on the patio, I noticed three young children at a nearby table. The oldest child was about ten years old and the other two were about seven or eight. There were saving a table. However, there was no adult anywhere in sight. There were alone for at least ten minutes, perhaps fifteen.
I suppose it is possible that the parent of these children could have been watching them from inside the ice cream parlor. I suppose that if a stranger had approached the children, the parent would have noticed. I suppose that if someone had tried to lure these children away, they would have not gone. But I'm not sure.
My point is that many parents assume their children are safe from all harm in certain locations. Disney is one of those locations. There is an atmosphere of safety, nostalgia, and worry-free living at Disney. I believe that it lulls parents into a false sense of security and that can be very dangerous.
In all fairness to Disney, however, my sticker project emerged far away from the theme parks. Children are unsupervised all the time in store, malls, movie theaters, and parks.
I challenge you to notice unsafe situations for children and I also challenge you to be certain you keep your own children safe. This does not only apply to very young children; older children are at risk also. I wish this were still a world where children could be children; where they could run and play alone outside or go to the mall alone at ten years old like I used to do sixty years ago. But that is not the case. And you are responsible because you are the parent. Could someone put a sticker on your child today?
I just heard this week via my television set, that Abercrombie and Fitch is marketing a push-up bikini top for seven year olds. If you are a friend of mine on Facebook, you have already heard my tirade. However, if you are not, or even if you are, I feel the need to elaborate.
You, the parent, have all of the power when it comes to purchasing items for your child. Yes, your child may pressure you, especially when they are teenagers. But remember way back when I taught you that "no means no"? Well this is one of those times to stick to your guns. You have the power of the purse and not only can you say no to your child, you MUST say no to manufacturers who think you have no sense.
Our children are growing up much too fast as it is. The hormones being injected into our foods are causing our childrens' little bodies to mature way too soon. The last thing we need to do is to perpetuate the idea that being grown up needs to begin at age seven. Please be aware of what advertising is doing. Be smart, be firm, and be powerful. Your money talks. Make sure it is saying, "NO".
Yesterday, I spent most of the morning seeking out community yard sales here in Ocala. I happened upon several sales being held by entire neighborhoods and on one street, I was fortunate enough to meet Avery. Avery is a little five year old girl who was running a lemonade stand for yard sale attendees. I am telling you this story because, while lemonade stands were very common sixty years ago when I was a girl, they are not so common these days.
Avery's mother had made a large pitcher of lemonade and Avery's father was supervising the sales. Avery, on the other hand, was dividing her time between being a charming salesperson, and running in the house to find out how much lemonade was selling for. When we became her first customers of the morning, her eyes just glistened. When we dropped two quarters into her hand, she said, "Dad, I have change!".
It is never too early to teach your child the value of work and the value of money. Earning money comes naturally for some children; but others must be taught, helped, and encouraged. I am confident that a portion of Avery's lemonade earnings will be put into the bank. Perhaps, she will be allowed to spend a portion of it on herself. I hope that her Mom and Dad will teach her that a portion of her earnings must pay for the lemonade supplies. And that some of her profit should be set aside for charity. I know all of this seems very complicated for a five year old and perhaps it is. However, waiting until a child is a teenager is much too late. Values and a strong work ethic develop over time with much effort and practice.
Remember that it's the little things that make up the big things later on. If you are to raise a responsible adult, you must begin teaching responsibility at a very early age. Who knew it could begin with some lemons and sugar? Actually, Avery's lemonade was Crystal Light but that doesn't really matter. What matters is that her parents took the time on a Saturday morning to make lemonade, make a sign, and supervise their child while she learned about product sales, customer service, and entrepreneurship. Way to go Mom and Dad!
Children are often very anxious to begin using a drawing or writing implement at a very young age because they like to mimic their parents and older siblings. When you notice that your child wants to draw or "write", one of the best implements you can give them is a big, fat crayon. A child's hand and finger muscles are not developed until at least age five or six and their fine motor skills are not yet fine tuned. And so, the bigger the tool, the easier it will be for your child to have control of his or her drawing and writing.
It is quite a project to find big, fat crayons. These crayons are often called "Primary Crayons" but they are not as plentiful as they once were. I have found them at WalMart but they are expensive. If you live on the West Coast of the US, and have a place like "Scraps", you may have more luck getting these crayons at a bargain price. Another tool to try is a large paintbrush; not one like you would use to paint the house but one that you might use to paint a canvas--a paintbrush with a substantial, round handle that your child can wrap his or her hand around. Fill a bucket with water and allow your child to "paint" with water on the sidewalk or some other safe surface.
Manipulating a large crayon or a large paintbrush is a precursor to writing and will help develop your child's fine and gross motor muscles. Stay away from traditional pencils. They are too small and not intended for the hands of a young child.
One of the best and most inexpensive playthings for your child, no matter what their age, is a cardboard box. That's right, an empty cardboard box. From the time your baby begins to crawl, he or she will be fascinated with a box. There was many a time that my children preferred to play with the box, rather than the toy that was packaged within the box. When your child is small, they love a box that is bigger than they are so that they can hide from you. You may need to cut a door in the side of the box because your child will love to go in and out numerous times.
As your child gets older, they will like several smaller boxes so that they can put them together to make a train. They can sit in the front box as the train engineer and fill the other "train cars" with their stuffed animals or dolls.
Large appliance boxes are the best for such things as an "office" for your child. They will spend hours in their "office" if you cut out windows and a door and allow them to take some of their prized possessions in there.
Perhaps the best and most entertaining use of a box is to drape it with a sheet or tablecloth to make a "box tent". "Tent making" is one of my favorite rainy day activities with small children. Sometimes, even the older kids want to take part. Never underestimate the value of a box. It is smart to keep one available just for those times when your child has "nothing to do". Whether you have a toddler or an older girl or boy, a cardboard box will ignite their imagination as nothing else. And it is absolutely free.
